How to make guilt-free cocoa date truffles

I is not a fancy Nancy, so I had to make ma own cashew butter. Skip a few steps if you have a jar of cashew butter in yo' pantry.

Repeat after me. Health, health, health.

In a food processor, whizz 200g of cashews to a butter. A little melted coconut oil (15g/1tbsp) will help them get jiggy.

Roasting cashews is optional but cashews do look hella sexier with a tan. And what do sexy cashews make? Creamier butter! Proper serious.

Preheat the oven to 200C. Place the cashews on a baking tray. If your cashews are anything like mine, they will be begging for some beautification. Brown is beautiful and they know it.

Roast the cashews in the oven for 10 minutes or until irresistibly golden. Remove and leave to cool. Now step away or you'll get burnt. Don't say I didn't warn you!

Place the completely cool cashews into the bowl of a food processor and start the party! If necessary, add 1-2tbsp of melted coconut oil to help them come together.

Smooth operator. Ready. Set. Let's make some crazy tasty cocoa date truffles!

Place the almonds and desiccated coconut into the bowl of a food processor. Preferably the same one.

Process the almonds and coconut to a coarse flour.

To the 'flour', add the cashew butter, cocoa and coconut oil.

Process the mixture until well combined.

Happy dates make happy truffles. Acknowledge their sacrifice for the greater good then add the dates to the food processor. Whizz the mixture some more until all ingredients are fully combined.

Resist the urge to eat the gooey yumminess straight from the processor. Transfer the mixture to a pretty bowl. Take photos and show off your self-control.

Using a melon baller or a spoon, scoop out 15-20g of the mixture and roll. Drink tea. And rock.

Continue until you can roll no mo' and your balls be bursting! I managed to get 32 morsels from the mixture. 32 that made it from the scoop to the bowl that is.

My, my, my, what good looking balls you have. Fancy a date?

Toast a little desiccated coconut on the hob.

I love me some toasted nuts.

Coat your perfectly rolled balls in the toasted coconut. Continue in the same fashion for all remaining truffles if you want a guilt-free treat. Or continue with the guide for the XXX rated treat.

How to make not so guilt-free cocoa date truffles. Coat them with chocolate! Yee-haw!

Choose your coating chocolate and place in a microwaveable bowl. I used white, milk and dark. I'm an equal opportunities chocolate devourer y'all. Don't hate.

Place the bowl in the microwave and blitz for 30 secs. Remove the bowl and stir well. Continue in the microwave in 10 sec bursts and remove and stir each time until the chocolate is half melted.

Stir the chocolate until completely melted and glossy. The chocolate is tempered and ready to use. If the chocolate does not completely melt by stirring, burst for another 10 secs.

Microwave ovens vary. My microwave is 700W. Adjust timings to suit your appliance. Tempering chocolate in the microwave is easy. Make sure the mixture is 50% melted and bring together by stirring.

The chocolate should not leave the microwave melted. It should be lumpy and become melted by continuous stirring. Once completely melted, you have tempered chocolate! Work quickly!

Dunk --->

---> roll --->

---> and lift. Repeat and repeat. This is an aerobic workout right here kids. Olympics 2016 here I come. Tempered Chocolate Triathlon.

Place the truffles on baking paper and leave to set. Use leftover chocolate to drizzle fancy patterns and sprinkle with remaining toasted coconut. Let your juices flow. Creative juices that is.

Pablo Picasso eat your heart out.

Now get your coat and ... taxi ... to the supermarket. You've got a date with my balls. Get rolling!

Once fully set, transfer to an airtight container and refrigerate. Theoretically, they will last a week or so. Practically, chomp, chomp, chomp.